“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”
When I started my blog, I shared with y’all that I had moved to Texas and started a new chapter in my life. Well, that chapter is coming to an end. I can officially announce that I am moving back home to Cincinnati, Ohio, to begin, yet again, a new chapter. It has been one of those decisions where God is clearly overpowering the teeter totter and letting me know, without doubt, where He is calling me. As I have mentioned before, I am very impulsive but right now I am patting myself on my back for the thoughts and prayers that went into my decision. I have been really busy with the move, finding the right job, and vacationing with my family so I am SO SORRY for the lack of posts! Don’t worry though, I am back 🙂
The title of this blog is Proverbs 27:17, which is quoted at the beginning of my post. I have been thinking a lot about what I wanted to write about next. If you haven’t noticed already, I am very particular about what I write and a lot of thinking goes into it. A lot of that is because I wear my heart on my sleeve. But I do know that indeed, my blog is a lifestyle blog, so you will be seeing more of a variety of my interests but right now my heart is overpowering with certain topics and I want to stay true to that. I hope it blesses y’all 🙂
When I started my journey in Dallas I didn’t know a single soul. I was starting over, which can be exciting but also very scary. I knew I needed to really put myself out there to meet new people in a strange, new city. And that’s exactly what I did. I jumped right in, making a big splash, and making sure I did everything I could to meet new friends and build relationships with the people I was meeting. To share more about myself, one of my biggest desires is to have true, valuable friendships. In the last two years, I have noticed that I love pouring into others because I have a longing for that. I have also realized that not everyone has the same desires that I do and the meaning of friendship looks different for everyone, and that is OK. More importantly, I have learned that I do not need to reach back for what was lost in my yesterdays. I do not need to reach for what I hope will be in my tomorrow. Instead, I need to live fully with what is right in front of me. And I need to truly see the gift of living in this moment.
Moving back home is something I wanted to celebrate with the friends I have made in Texas. Instead, I find myself feeling as if I am leaving a ghost town. In my last two months of living in Dallas I have felt complete isolation. Sadly, I don’t know how my “friends” are feeling and it has led to many sleepless nights for me. However, it has also taught me a valuable lesson: instead of always looking to get fulfillment from my loved ones and the other blessings in my life, I can simply enjoy them for what they are.
If you have ever felt alone, you know it’s a tough place to be in. You feel a sense of longing and you know you want more from this life and you also know that God created you for more. God does call us to be in community and wants us to be surrounded by love and grace shown by others. Check out Romans 12:4-5, Pslam 133:1, and 1 Peter 3:8. If you are finding yourself in this season of isolation, let me encourage you. It is good for God’s people to be in a place of longing, so they feel desperation. It’s in those moments where we become empty enough and open enough to discover the holiness we are made of. When we become stuffed full of other things and never allow ourselves to be in a place of longing, we can’t recognize the deeper spiritual battle that is going on.
The last few months have been extremely hard for me and moving forward knowing certain friendships aren’t moving on with me does feel like a loss. I believe it’s important to be real with our feelings and allow ourselves to experience those emotions. I believe it’s also important to recognize that forgiveness is mandatory; reconciliation is optional. As I mentioned earlier, you’re not going to meet anyone in this world who works exactly like you. People will have different opinions, values, and ways that they handle situations and again, that is OK. I have simply learned that I am not equipped to handle what anyone else has in their life, both good and bad and what that person has, is a package deal. I have been assigned a load that I can handle and I want to be obedient to that. As Proverbs 27:17 says, a friend sharpens a friend. This verse holds so much meaning for me and I have started to look at it in a different light. In the moments of hardship and confusion is where I have learned to trust in the Lord the most. I cling to His promises above all. Even though it has been hard to lose certain friendships and to not understand why, I have learned more about the Kristen that God is molding me into; He is building a palace within me and as long as I can learn to be the friend that He wants me to be, that is something that makes the isolation worth while.
If you take anything away from this post, let it be this: God is using all of your experiences, both good and bad, to develop your character to match your calling.
With grace and love,